PHOTOSHOOT| Wet look

Welcome !

Today I want to write you an update on my life and recent happenings, and also update you with the newest photoshoot that I recently had. Ever since moving to the United Kingdom I have felt completely lost, I have been swinging between one extreme of crazy happiness to an extreme of a deep sadness and I no longer knew what my purpose in life was. Before, I had always considered myself a happy person and could never understand people saying they felt unhappy, had a bad relationship with food, did not want to go out or tal to anyone. For the first time in life I had lost motivation for exercise for a few months. I still kept on going to the gym and pursued with my certifications but I was questioning what was good for me. I unintentionally lost weight and happened to have crazy low body fat what messed with my mind greatly, therefore causing me a disordered eating mindset.

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For a very long time I would lie to my family and friends that everything was alright… Like we all do during hard times right ? I could not sleep normally, eat normally, do my daily activities because whatever I did felt so pointless. I have no idea what caused me to be in such a bad stage in life, I think it must have been a mix of different issues and subconscious stress. But two months ago I made one of my biggest dreams come true. Never had I believed I would have reached this far by the age of 20. I became a personal trainer and gym instructor at one of the leisure centres in my town. I finally met people with similar interest to mine, health freaks like myself and everything went back to being normal. In fact… I am probably the happiest I have ever been, I do not worry about things that I cannot control, I just let life be. I also have more certifications to come in the future that I am looking forward to. Moreover, I have understood that all of us come through hard times in life and finally confessed to myself that maybe help was needed but I would not admit it

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For all the young, teenage girls out there having bad body image, disordered eating habits, go and seek for help it is nothing to be ashamed of and I think all of us will go through a tough times when we need help and that is okay. As I am writing this today, I am bloated, tired and probably ate too much. But I am happy as I am, accept myself, seek the cause if I ever get any bad emotions, accept the feeling and just deal with it. I cannot wait for what the future holds, am proud of my past, all the ups and downs and even of what I went through because that gave me a much greater understanding of people’s behaviour and how our inside issues affect our doings.

Stay positive people and love yourself first !

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