To all my family members and best friends…
I knew I would have moved out to a different country to study ever since I was 8 years old. Still, no one including myself believed it would actually come to real life and I would have made my childhood dream come true. And here I am, now 20 years old working two jobs, studying polish girl living in the UK. I was 19 when I moved out, but 17 when I first moved to Germany to work for about two months. During that time I learned what real pain of missing family and friends was, how it felt like being broke or how to cook for myself and spend time lonely.
My uncle who plays a father like role for me now that I’m in the UK almost completely alone, lives over an hour from here but still I only end up seeing him maybe once a month, not to mention how rarely do I see my family – once in three or four months maybe ?
Honestly, trying not to take money from your parents and be independent requires quite a good mental strength. And that’s not the only thing I’ve mentally had to deal with ever since coming here. Changing jobs and therefore environments 3 times now, dealing with my previous landlords who are trying to play me for money… completely myself because why would I worry anyone else and… how are you supposed to take real life lessons if you can’t handle adult life ?
Now that all of my uni friends who have not found jobs moved back to Poland for those few months summer break in between year 1 and 2 of uni, I wake up being kinda lonely, with Netflix of course. But that’s life. I aim to save money, be able to pay for my parents’ holidays, save for my own holidays and smaller trips. Everything in life comes for a reason. Having those mental ups and downs I bought a book – 12 rules for life. Please everybody, read it. It’s a true antidote and kick ass literature that will make you feel better about yourself especially when trying to do something good but having to cope with shit loads of obstacles.
Do I regret any of my decisions ?
I regret being very impolite to my parents when on the phone. Sometimes when I feel a lot of pressure I think I end up putting my anger on them. But no.. I do not regret moving out, deciding to study here. I have the awesome opportunity to learn how to live and what live gifts is with at a very young age. Having chosen a university in Poland I probably would have stayed at my parents. I wouldn’t have to learn how to be independent and cope with problems. I’m grateful for whatever happened so far. Moreover, seeing my family or going back home now shows me how grateful I should be for having them and how much I used to take it for granted, now I fully appreciate every moment spent with them.
Would I recommend similar decisions to you ?
Yes, please get out of your comfort zone, explore the world, cry and be happy, overcome your insecurities, overcome problems, cope with them, appreciate the good and the bad.
NEVER GIVE UP
To my family and friends… I love you